We live in amazing times. That doesn’t deny that certain aspects ought to be changed or addressed for us all to live with equality and peace of mind. But if we can let go of what isn’t working for a minute, and focus on the advantages of this time and space—it’s possible to fill the mind with admiration and gratitude for what we do have, right here and now. Sometimes that feeling comes from asking yourself a few downreaching questions.
• with life •
– Are you doing the right thing? Are you ashamed of your actions?
If so, that shame can transfer into blame to others in your life when in all actuality it’s on you. A now distant friend of mine created a situation that transpired into a blame game that I was made the lamb for her unhappiness instead of addressing her life’s issues head on without me being the focus. Shame can make lies evolve to be greater than the original intent. Being honest about a situation and owning your behavior is the only way to walk away with integrity.
Right now I’ve put a lot of guards up because I don’t want to get hurt again but it’s a constant push/pull because I love being available to women for support but this has been a learning experience in access to my heart and time.
– Do you have too much in life? Are you hanging onto things that are no longer useful, joyful, or beautiful?
I am a self-proclaimed purging queen but I only give myself the credit because it’s rather true. If I don’t use something, I donate it. If it carries a negative experience, I donate it. If it’s something I’m no longer drawn to, I pass it on so it can receive the attention it deserves. Take a look around your space and see what you could give up to bring someone else joy. You may find it extremely liberating to have less. It’s cliché but true for me; less is more.
– Are you in a good or bad situation?
Assess the situation in which you exist. Regardless of the climate, know that it changes; sooner or later. Nothing is permanent except death. Live through the situation so you can perserve the unique perspective later. My darkest days have shown me my strength and my lightest days are my favorite lights to remind me of their existence when I hit a bump.
– What are your goals?
If you don’t have a goal to look forward to, what will give you joy? From the smallest victories of making your bed and wearing matching socks to running a marathon or getting the job of your dreams… goals are goals. When you hit them it’s quite fulfilling. Give it a whirl, you may surprise yourself as the best is yet to come.
– Are you content?
Forget happy. Happy is fleeting, towards you and sometimes away from you, so you must be in a constant state of contentment. Concrete in the form of love and contentment are the foundation in which you can survive. I just watched the documentary, “Three Identical Strangers” and while the theme was about triplets intentionally separated at birth, the moral of the story was to live a life nurturing yourself and others and to pay close attention to mental health. Be content by loving the hell out of yourself and others, get help if you feel unhappy.
Let go of what isn’t working and focus on what does. It may feel difficult because you have to cut through complexities with razor sharp certainty but it’s a necessity to beautifully refine your life.