Before I delve into the most common sense topic on dating let’s all agree that if you and your ex had any sort of adult relationship, you should honor it. Don’t break that respect just for an opportunity to add another notch to your bedside table.
Time to dig a little deeper … I’m going to need some coffee for this one.
Let’s begin and connect the dots on a common sense topic that you should already know.
1) You’re probably going to ruin their friendship.
It doesn’t matter what chemistry you think that you have with your exes friend. No amount of chemistry will ever add up to anything that could ruin a friendship between two people that existed before you even thought about entering into either of their lives.
On the off chance that you didn’t destroy their friendship you would still have to face your ex every time that you all hangout. Awkward, party of 3!
To make that matter worse, your ex probably told that friend everything about how you. From your first date down to the dirty details of a breakup. It’s too close to home in my book! Super duper creeper mode.
2) Louisville is small but not that small.
The most logical route to take after a breakup is to cut all ties with your ex and their friends. If you met her friends through her, it makes you look like Creepy McCreeperton to date within that realm so do yourself and their friends a favor, date someone they don’t know directly.
I realize it’s one degree of Kevin Bacon in our city but take it as a challenge and date someone that isn’t besties with your ex.
3) The Golden Rule.
This should have been the first and only reason … Just think with your mind but take your heart with you, if you can even find it to begin with.
Let’s pretend that you actually have both. How would you like to see one of your ex-flames date with one of your best friends?
It wouldn’t feel good, it would actually hurt worse than seeing them with someone else because the two people represent two parts of intimacy that you have held with each of them.
Friends are the people we tell everything to and the ones rely on the most. Whereas the people we date have those aspects and some other deeply personal things that only couples would know and do. Imagining two people from those realms cross right in front of you would be a nightmare.
Don’t be a monster.
Don’t cross that trust boundary!
4) Don’t ruin your reputation.
No one wants to date the last guy at the bar thats dated every woman he can. Dating isn’t a sport, it fulfills a basic human need for companionship.
Notice I wrote companionship not championship.
Boys seek multiple conquests and cower behind the brick wall they build to shield them from feeling anything real.
Men seek one relationship to build a life with one woman to build a foundation of love that builds them both and the family they have and the one they’re building on.
Here comes the tough love:
Bro, pretend you have a little bit of class and pull back from the idea and the flirting that you’ve already started. It’s inappropriate and makes you look like you have a complete lack of self-esteem.
Why hit on your ex’s friends? Don’t be a child. Grow up and move along.
Since we’re probably dealing with some deep rooted issues, go buy some ice cream, and find a spot in the park where you can sit.
Make some notes about why and how you’re going to love yourself.
Get it together.
Dating anyone and everyone you can won’t fill that empty space in your heart. Only self-love can.