Every day when we wake up we have the opportunity to make a choice about which path we’ll take, there is a positive one and a negative one. Each path is unique to each person given their circumstances, goals, fears, experiences, et cetera. Being aware of the choices we make, observing why we are making them to make sure they aline with our values and staying true to ourselves during the process is one of the most courageous things we can do. And it is something we MUST do to stay authentic to ourselves.
Throughout recent months I started working with Jennifer Blair, a phenomenal life coach I met through Junior League of Louisville. She has taken the time to know me so she can coach me on an intimate level; understands my strengths and weaknesses, the forthcoming problems and blind spots, and has the right level of empathy to ask the right questions to help me navigate through my goals. The most powerful thing we’ve worked on together so far was identifying my Excavated Values. This list helps me with a check-list of making sure my needs (values) are being met when I’m making decisions. If you haven’t guessed it yet, I’m going to share one of them with you today.
This value is a a huge principle in the foundation of my blog. Writing and sharing my work is one of the most intimate things I do with other people. It connects my life with yours by allowing you to learn about my experiences, hopes, fears, and such. This week I was jokingly called “Louisville’s Taylor Swift” by a new, amazingly funny friend. I tell you this before I tell you what my value is because I think Taylor Swift is amazing for being so forward with her life. If someone has the time to put me into a category that is related to her means they have taken the time to read my blog which is my bravery put into action and having the desired outcome; someone reading it.
The value I’m referencing has been affectionately named “Bad Ass Eleanor” for Eleanor Roosevelt. She led a life of service for the humanity of our country believing that “we have to continue fighting for freedom of religion, freedom of speech, and freedom from want, for all these things that must be gained in peace as well as in war.” Please note, I know that my blog about beauty, life and love is not in any way comparable to the work she did, but she is an inspiration to it.
Freedom, independence and fearless are the three words I use to describe this value and relate it back to the daily decisions I make. The specific daily decision I make for this blog is to write. My desire to share my life comes from the hope to connect with other people on an intimate level. Because of my writing I have made new friends and given a lot of friends further insight into my life. This Sunday I am having brunch with a woman that I know socially but we’ve connected because of my blog; because I put myself out here to connect with other people that are having the same experiences … It’s nice to know we’re not alone in the experiences we have and lives we lead. Makes life seem so much more romantic to know we’re all floating trying to figure it out before we expire.
The process for my daily writing begins with listening to my singers & songwriters station on Pandora while I am sitting on my bed with the window open or sitting on the floor in my slowly evolving living room and I just write. Writing through whatever is on my mind; it’s better for me to get it out of my head then keep it in there eating at me. For me, it helps connect all of the dots; the words decipher what exactly those dots are and then they form a blog post. Sometimes they are published, and sometimes they are kept private just for me to view. But I never know what it will look like until I’m finished but as every writer knows, we are never really finished because everything can always be edited and we always want to edit everything.
Editing can be applied to our daily life; our daily decisions to make today a positive or negative day. The most important thing to edit is to hear the “edits” from others when they attempt to pass judgement on your life or blog. For the very first time today my blog was brought up as a point of contention with someone that was the giver of “butterflies”. At first it really put my morning into a negative spin. I texted with a friend and joked that today’s blog post would be titled “Confessions of an Overly Nice Girl” — playing up the “Louisville’s Taylor Swift” joke. After my attempt at finding a zen moment, I had a realization that is really scary, no matter what I do, no matter what any of us do, there are going to be people who will think that what we’re doing is a joke, dumb, worthless, et cetera.
The beauty of this negative experience is that we can edit them out of our lives. We have to get over the people that don’t believe in the beauty of our dreams by letting them go. Be the master of your destiny by staying true to yourself and never letting anyone pass judgement on you living your life because they are afraid to live their life as bravely. And as Mrs. Roosevelt said, “Do what you feel in your heart to be right- for you’ll be criticized anyway. You’ll be damned if you do, and damned if you don’t.”
Be damned. Be beautiful. Be you. Be true to yourself.